New Terminology Explanations

In this modern world there are so many new words that are evolving in our society, here's a brief explanation of some of the latest (thanks goes to pprune.org /Jet blast)


TESTICULATING.
Waving your arms around and talking bollocks.

BLAMESTORMING.
Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything and then leaves.

SALMON DAY.
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die.

CUBE FARM.
An office filled with cubicles.

PRAIRIE DOGGING..
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. (This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)

SALAD DODGER.
An excellent phrase for an overweight person.

SWAMP DONKEY.
A deeply unattractive person..

AEROPLANE BLONDE.
One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

OH-NO SECOND.
That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake. (e.g. You've hit 'reply all').

GREYHOUND.
A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.

MONKEY BATH .
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: "Oo! Oo! Oo! Aa! Aa! Aa!"

MYSTERY BUS.
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the toilet after your 10th pint and whisks away all the unattractive people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.

PICASSO BUM.
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got 4 buttocks 

 Have a great day :-)

 

*The way we do it in Australia!*

*The way we do it in Australia!*


This morning I was
in luck and was able to buy two cartons of Victoria
Bitter beer cheap at the local supermarket.

I placed the boxes on the front seat and
headed back home. I stopped at a
service station for fuel where a
drop-dead gorgeous blonde in a short skirt was filling up
her car at the next pump.

She glanced over at the two boxes of booze, bent over
and leaned in my passenger window, and said

in a sexy voice: "I'm a big believer in barter, fella. Would you be
interested in trading sex for beer?"



Well,I thought for a few seconds and asked:......................


.............."What kind of beer 'ya got?" 

     

What a great testimonial for the above book :-)

 

Too often you read a joke book that has good jokes, bad jokes, and HORRIBLE jokes. Dean, your book is one of those rarities in which, like an album by a band where EVERY song is good, the whole joke book rocks! 

I'm a cheap bastard, but I truly believe I got my money's worth with your book. It's added a HUGE amount of ammunition to my joke arsenal when I'm hanging out with people... I'm damn sure gonna buy Volume 2 if it every comes out. Thanks Dean. You rock.
-- Matt Fort Hood, Texas

Dang...

Better The Less You Know